Barteaux, Betty Mae
Born May 26, 1920 to Hershel and Hazel Stevens in Los Angeles, California, passed away on January 25, 2005, at her home in Palm Springs, California.
Betty was raised in the West Adams district of Los Angeles and loved to tell stories about how she and her sister, Eileen, worked as box lunch extras at Twentieth Century Fox. Betty graduated from Los Angeles High School in 1938. Shortly after that, according to family legend, she went to the old Santa Monica skating rink near Venice, and spotted a tall, good looking young man across the floor. They skated right at each other, to the middle of the rink.
Thus began her relationship with her husband of over sixty years, Dean Barteaux. Dean and Betty lived in Santa Monica and then moved to Cheviot Hills as Dean's business, Barco Aviation, prospered.
Recollections: Melinda Pillsbury-Foster
It was in Cheviot Hill that they raised their child second adopted child, Richard.
The first son they adopted, also Richard, was taken back by the birth mother before their adoption was finalized. Betty, herself, explained this to me while she was also trying to instruct me on what a "good wife" should be. She also shared some of the shocking stories on the traumas she experienced while raising the son they had wanted for so long.
These stories includes multiple instances of violent outbreaks on Richard's part and a complete disinterest in any kind of schoolwork. Somehow, I was supposed to do something about this.
Otherwise, the content of our conversations involved doing nothing but cooking, ordering the maid around, and paying close attention to one's wardrobe. I was polite, but astonished. My family expectations on what subjects should consume my attention assumed a clear understanding of etiquette, settings for the table, depending on who and where you were being entertained. Books were provided and I read these with interest, fascinated between the difference between American, French, English and Russian practices. Clearly, the kind of event to which you were inviting guests was very much on point.
But these were minor points. but the overwhelming focus was studying subjects which interested me. Having begun building my own library by age 4, I had early become addicted to the written word. By age 7 my own library included science fiction, poetry, especially interesting articles from Scientific American, geology, archeology, some sociology and philosophy.
If Richard's parents had not taken him to Hawaii almost immediately after he asked me to marry him, and I had not yet realized that the fact he listened patiently while I talked, occasionally nodding in agreement, the ring he had presented me with would have been returned forthwith.
So, there I was stuck with him and Betty was showing me, as if this were utterly unknown, how to make deviled eggs and how to mend underwear. This last really surprised me as there was not the least thrift in their lifestyle.
Evidently, it took many years for Betty to finally, grudgingly, admit to her self that Richard, Senior, my former husband of about 7 months when I escaped him, was incapable of holding a job of any kind and also habitually violent.
It appears to have been his relationship with his second wife, who better tolerated abuse than did I, who, for a time, gave them hope Richard would grow into someone who was not violent and also capable to rational and productive action.
As you see from Richard's life-history, this was a hope never to be realized. Instead, they substituted Richard's second son for taking over the family business.
Betty Knew What She Wanted
From an obituary in the Los Angeles Times:
Betty loved travel, clothes and diamonds. She was a member of the Garden Club of West Los Angeles and the Los Angeles Country Club. She exemplified style, elegance, taste and generosity that seems rare today. Betty and Dean retired to their vacation home in Palm Springs in 1990 where they entertained friends and family with cards, swimming and sight seeing. Betty was predeceased by her husband, Dean; her son, Richard; and her sister, Eileen. She is survived by her grandson, Richard Barteaux, Jr., great-grandchildren, Brooke, Kyle and Travis; granddaughter, Angel Rogers, her husband Damon, great-grandchildren, Jason and Sean; and Betty's nephew, Michael Castle. No services are planned.
